Wednesday, September 29

free and clear


I am trying to figure out how to describe yesterday's events.  The morning was full of anxiety and stomach knots but thankfully my Husband was here to try and keep me calm.  Every time the door would open at the clinic I would hope that the nurse would not call my name.  They are just so punctual there though that it was soon our turn.  The worst part of the test was definitely the tube.  I think actually seeing it was worse then feeling it.  I do not do well when presented with medical equipment.

The test lasted five minutes.  While I did not enjoy any part of the five minutes, it definitely was not the worst five minutes of my life.

I am all clear!  No, that is not a typo, I am all clear and seemingly issue free!  The reproductive endocrinologist was trying to get me to watch the "beautiful spill over" of the liquid via the screen, but I thought it best not to risk passing out so my Husband watched instead.  This is great news for us.  Having one major issue to tackle is challenge enough.  Next milestone.. friday's consent signing.. bring it on.

I was surprised how tired I was post test yesterday and had difficulty not feeling somewhat violated.  I suppose this is something I will need to work on, as infertility seems to force you into many uncomfortable physical situations.  

For now I will try to relish in the small victory and look forward to being one step closer to becoming three or maybe four.

I love this girl with plane polaroid.  It hangs in our master bedroom where it reminds me to try to be a little more care free in life.

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